


You've Got Mail

by fairmanor



Series: The Campaign: A Series of Vignettes About the Time David and Patrick Secretly Ran Against Each Other in the Council Elections [4]
Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Drabbles, Except they love each other in real life, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, No angst here, Ronnie Loves Stirring Shit Up, This is like a political You've Got Mail, Town Council, and hate their mystery candidate, just misunderstandings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-05 01:40:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 731
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25246291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairmanor/pseuds/fairmanor
Summary: It’s election season in Schitt’s Creek. And this year, there’s more than one member of the Rose-Brewer household dealing with a…familiar rival.
Relationships: Patrick Brewer/David Rose
Series: The Campaign: A Series of Vignettes About the Time David and Patrick Secretly Ran Against Each Other in the Council Elections [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1791547
Comments: 9
Kudos: 31





	You've Got Mail

**Author's Note:**

> \- Hello again! I kind of forgot about this series because I got distracted writing a larger fic, but here we are again.  
> \- This is the fourth instalment in a series! So if you've landed on this fic randomly, make sure to read the others first :)

Though neither of them knows it, David and Patrick end up being both the best and the worst parts of each other’s weeks.

Patrick is leaning over the till at Rose Apothecary, jaw set and fingers steepled tensely on the desk. The fan in his laptop is whirring manically.

That’s what he imagines Derek Russell’s voice sounds like, the stupid prick. Nasally and manic like a wasp on acid.

‘Dear Peter Bennett,

Make no mistake, I fully appreciate your intent to campaign and wish you _all_ the luck in the world.’

(He’d actually made the effort to italicise the _all._ Bastard. _)_

‘What I don’t appreciate, however, is a blatant disregard for my personal campaigning journey in the form of you continuing to appropriate my ideas after I quite clearly laid my claim over them last week.

Oh, and speaking of campaigns…I’ve attached an itemised list of things I think you should probably be doing instead if you want to make yourself stand out in our _identical_ methods.

Warmest regards,

Derek Russell’

Patrick clicks open the link that Derek has attached, a little surprised that Derek would actually do something to help him out.

It’s a blank page.

Patrick scoffs, half in shock, half at the utter audacity of this sanctimonious asshole. It catches David’s attention. David seems to pick up on Patrick’s stiffened posture and makes his way over. Patrick clicks the window shut and returns the screen to an unassuming spreadsheet.

‘Everything okay?’ David says. His warm, strong hands are soothing across Patrick’s shoulders. He leans into the massage.

‘Meh, I guess. Mm, that’s nice. Some of the margins for this month aren’t looking great,’ he lies.

David hums sympathetically and hugs Patrick closer.

‘Two days, babe,’ he says, anticipation in his voice.

Patrick smiles, thinking about the weekend of familiar nature and relaxation ahead of them in his hometown. It’s about time they both had a break.

When David has returned to stock conditioners, Patrick shoots out a quick email to his worst enemy before deciding to forget about campaigns for the rest of the day.

***

While Peter Bennett grinds down on his last nerve, David can’t help but thoroughly enjoy this weird, _Your Obedient Servant_ thing he’s got going on with him, whoever he is. He has to fight the urge to sign his emails off with “D. Russ” every time.

While Patrick is out getting lunch for the both of them, David pulls up his phone and finds another new email, sent just a few minutes ago.

‘Derek Russell.’

( _You’re supposed to write dear,_ David thinks. _It’s common courtesy, you dick.)_

‘Make no mistake; if whatever I’m doing is drawing focus away from your ‘campaign’ (which, might I add, has been thoroughly impractical and goes against the logistics of actually contributing to a town council), then I fully intend to continue.

I don’t appreciate snide empty documents and false accusations about MY campaign ideas. When we first meet, whenever that may be, I guarantee that no such petty actions will help you when you’re no longer in front of your screen.

Peter Bennett’

This one was _particularly_ acidic. He imagines a hulking, moody old man with more ideas up his ass than his sleeve, hunched behind a computer that’s older than David, and David’s lips purse in annoyance.

Before he can dedicate any more time to irritation, the store bell rings and David relaxes at the sight of his husband who’ll have perfected his coffee order and has probably brought him one sweet treat more than David had asked for.

David pulls him in for a grateful kiss when he reaches the desk.

‘I feel like we’ve both been feeling a bit off this week,’ Patrick says. ‘Why don’t we close up early and head to my parents now, rather than on Saturday?’

David smiles widely, leaning in again. ‘I’d love that.’

God, he loves this man so much.

They belt showtunes all the way there, managing to get through all of _Hamilton_ just before they reach their first service station. Suddenly, _Your Obedient Servant_ seems a lot funnier to the both of them, but it’s not like either can say anything. They both have a fun weekend with their loving husband ahead of them, after all, and they won’t let some snarky Derek Russell or some hostile Peter Bennett get in the way of it.


End file.
